Is Love Blind?
Dear Diary, I have a confession to make. I’m a Love Is Blind junkie. I watch every season of it in every country in every language. Sometimes I like to kid myself into believing that I’m expanding my cultural knowledge by watching Love is Blind: Brazil. I mean, I’m just polishing up on my Portuguese, […]
It’s Not Cancer
Dear Diary, It’s not cancer. IT’S NOT CANCER. I asked the ortho twice yesterday to be safe. Both times, he gave me an emphatic no. I’ll take that. As most of you know, my sister recently died of glioblastoma. Cancer—even the mention of it—scares the bajeezus out of me now. What it actually IS, however, […]
The Fear
Dear Diary, I’ve been afraid of a lot of things in my lifetime—spiders, heights, Jason Vorhees, the under-the-bed clown in Poltergeist, drinking out of my toddlers’ used cups, jolting myself awake while snoring on a plane, inadvertently swallowing bugs while I’m sleeping—the list goes on. The thing is, it’s usually pretty easy to recognize when […]
A Quarter-Life Celebration
Dear Diary, He turns 25 today. A quarter of a century. From a newborn on life support to an adult on his own. I wrote his story years ago, when the memories were still relatively fresh and new. So much time has passed. So much has changed in our lives. But one true thing will […]
Skating Away
When Christmas morning arrived and there were two shiny new pairs of ice skates under the tree—one for me and one for my big sister, Carrie—I was in heaven. I tied the laces together, carried them on my shoulder, and waited for the temperature to drop. I sang, “Please don’t let this feeling end, it’s everything I am, everything I want to be…” over and over again until my sister finally told me to give it a rest and poked me with the spit-sharpened end of a Jolly Rancher stick.
From the “H” Word to the “C” Word
Dear Diary, After I had my fourth baby in 2002, my OB/GYN looked at me and said, “Katrina, you should not have any more babies. Your uterus is very, very tired.” But she had this adorable speech impediment, so imagine all her r’s sounding like w’s. It’s one of my favorite stories—my tired uterus. When […]
At Odds with Myself
Dear Diary, Since coming out, I have downsized my physical life in numerous ways. From a 5-bedroom house with a full basement to a 3-bedroom cottage rental to a 2-bedroom apartment to a studio space to a 20-foot travel trailer to a 35-foot fifth wheel. (Okay, the fifth wheel was a space upgrade, but we […]
HuffPo Said Yes!
Dear Diary, Remember when I said I got an essay rejection on the first full business day of 2024? On January 5, I submitted a second essay to HuffPost Personal—per editor, Noah Michelson’s encouragement—and on January 10, he said yes to essay #2. It was a quick but emotional ride, and I think the lessons […]
Moving into 2024
Dear Diary, The beginning of a new year is traditionally a time to think about how to become a better person, how much weight to lose, how much alcohol to give up, what kind of parenting to engage in, what career changes to make, how to be a better friend, a better human, a better […]
Happy Holidays. (Or Not.)
Society says we should be jolly and happy and thankful and joy-filled during these days. Commercials tell us to feel the magic and the wonder. But we don’t all feel it. Some of us feel hollowed out. Some of us feel lonely. Some of us feel the weight of having a double-digit bank account or mounting credit card bills. Some of us watch cheesy holiday movies and feel that we’re not enough, that we don’t measure up.
Some of those people are me. Some might be you.